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Lisa, vam­pi­res are make-belie­ve, like elves, grem­lins, and Eski­mos. We star­ted out like Romeo and Juliet, but it ended up in tra­ge­dy. Attempt­ed mur­der? Now honest­ly, what is that? Do they give a Nobel Pri­ze for attempt­ed che­mis­try? Get rea­dy, skanks! It’s time for the truth train! Books are use­l­ess! I only ever read one book, “To Kill A Mocking­bird,” and it gave me abso­lut­e­ly no insight on how to kill mocking­birds! Sure it taught me not to judge a man by the color of his skin…but what good does *that* do me?